Please, remember me forever. Believe in me as someone who's never gonna wish you well.

There's just something about this album by Lisa Marie... I keep coming back to it. And I just love the song, "Idiot." =^)

The ex sent me an email recently. Apparently, she's getting her knickers in a twist because I just can't seem to put a priority on sending her something she decided to ask for a month ago.

Not sure what the hurry is, suddenly, after being without it for this long. Especially since I know she replaced it. She must have a gift idea in mind for someone...

But that's none of my never mind...

However, that song is incredibly appropriate when I think about her. Is that wrong? I suppose that even though I've regained solid ground underneath me, it's natural to feel some resentment, eh? Perhaps I always will... oh well.

C'est la vie! At least I can take comfort in the fact I'll probably never see her again anyway. =^D

Yes, that's comforting!

Today, I treated myself to an Italian sub at my favorite coffee house. That wasn't the highlight, however. Being invited to check out my barista's luscious ass was. =^D

Very, very nice booty!

Lately, I've been so focused on my school work that I haven't been spending any time out. No consorting with the fairer sex... there'll be plenty of time for that when my papers are turned in.

However, I never miss the opportunity to banter with the women I do encounter. That would be a crime! Besides, if I don't use my gifts... I could lose them! ;^)

Plus, it's good to lay the groundwork for whatever may happen in the future!

What i'm listening to:

Turned to Black
Lisa Marie Presley
Now What

Last night, I made an observation. Actually, I'd been observing for several months now that hot girls don't wear Levi's.

In fact, every hot girl I've talked to lately has been wearing a pair of designer jeans. A couple have even been complimented on them.

I don't know if I'm becoming shallow with my fashion and looks obsession, but I don't really think it's going to matter at this stage of my life. So, I made a conscious decision to be shallow.

I'm not going to date anyone who isn't at least a seven. To put this in perspective, I would classify "C" as a 5.

But, she wore Levi's. For that I should dock her to a 4.5. However, in my defense, in that small town in the great white north I was overwhelmed by this sense of scarcity. I held onto her, because I thought she was the best I could do. At the time it was better than being alone.

Of course, I'll continue talking to everyone... that's all part of the game.

So, why did I pick seven? Why not just be a total ass and say nine or ten?

Because, and this will sound like a total ass, I haven't seen a ten around here... and there are very, very few nines.

Until I make that migration to Colorado, Arizona, or the Vegas... I'll settle for less. =^P

So, I will apologize to all of the "okay" looking girls for the opportunities they will be missing with me... but I'm sure we can still be friends. I'm not above being friends!

Besides, one can argue that there is no such thing as an ugly girl... only a lazy one. Anyone can make herself over into a nine or ten.

That's just who I am and how I feel. I don't make any apologies for it.

What i'm listening to:

Not Ur Girl
Katharine McPhee
Katharine McPhee

Another holiday weekend is in the history books.

Even though last weekend consisted of a couple of parties and next weekend will also consist of a couple of parties, my holiday weekend didn't consist of any.

Which is fine. I enjoyed my run volunteering at the civic theater moving sets and staging backstage. When I wasn't at the theater, I was working on the house. I even recruited a buddy for some assistance, with help I should have it ready by the weekend!

W00t!

Also, of note, I had some successful interactions with a couple of lovely females on Monday. I had a "Hooters" girl eating out of my hand... or at least off of my plate. I learned that she is a business major who's taking summer courses like myself. It was a fun and flirty time.

So, why didn't I get a number? I'm really not sure. Some moments I think I'm ready, but others, that thought just doesn't surface. Everything else is there now, so it is definitely time to work on that part of my game.

Then, last night, I met this amazing blonde at a local sports bar. I'm still becoming accustomed to having girls actually be "into" me... but this interaction went amazingly well. There were pats on the ass, she stroked my chest a couple of times and kept pointing at the 1up mushroom on my shirt, and she even took a hairbrush out of her purse and brushed my hair.

Who knows where it would have gone? It was also the first time I had been cock-blocked, by her brother and the friend I was with. Her brother, ok, I get that... my friend, well, he wanted her for himself.

So, she got frustrated and left the group and sat with a table of tools. I wrestled with wanting to lead her away and staying with my friend, her brother and the rest of the group I was with. I stayed, even though I should have went with her.

But instead, we just exchanged looks across the bar. It wasn't a situation I was prepared for, so I probably could have handled it better and at least snagged her number... but I fell in with my friends.

So, are there rules about things like this? My friend said he thought he had a shot with her, but he'd have to clear it with her brother because they are friends. I *know* I had (have?) a shot with her, and I just met the guy last night, so am I bound by these rules as "friend of a friend?"

Am I overthinking things as usual? More than ever, I realize there will be other girls, but I can't just let every single girl who's into me go because of circumstances.

Sheesh.

Anyway, her brother really didn't like it when she started getting close to one of the tools she was talking to, so he pulled the "have to get up early" card, and they left.

My friend and I went to another club, where he ran into a group of girls he knows. I haven't figured out why he likes this sports bar so much, because there aren't any good looking girls there, and he always manages to spend his entire evening talking with one who keeps reminding him that the "window of opportunity is closed."

I'm *so* beyond that, and was really rather bored during the three hours spent there.

Better nights are ahead though. It should be an exciting journey! =^)

The "man" has finally arrived!

What i'm listening to:

Foolin'
Def Leppard
Pyromania

That's what time I arrived home from the slumber party. A lot of drinking. A handful of gorgeous Hooters waitresses in slinky black evening gowns. More than a handful, actually! =^)

A game of Twister, "Heart and Soul" on the piano, more drinking, some nekkid bewbs. A lot of groping by the young ladies, hugs, and drunken kisses.

And I have no idea what was in those shots I drank. I'm not sure that's a good thing!

What a fantastic evening... it could have been better, but at least I met some new people and had interesting new experiences! =^D

And now that I've made "Phoebe's" acquaintance... who knows what kind of parties I'll end up at in the future!

Definitely something to look forward to!

What i'm listening to:

Forgotten
Avril Lavigne
Under My Skin

It started innocently enough. She was a client of mine, and I'd noticed that she was appending little questions about me to the end of her business emails.

Little things... like inquiring what I do for fun, how my weekend was, and in addition, she was telling me how she is and what she was up to. Within a few weeks, she was making stops by the office when she had things to deliver rather than using a messenger.

I remember being unsure about how I felt about these signals. I'd never really recieved signals from someone so sexy before. I still don't know exactly what it is about her... she just "oozes" sex appeal.

Plus, she was married... so while I would entertain some fantasies, I would never have thought to act on them at the time. I remember feeling confused, because I knew she was married, but I had never seen "him," nor had she ever mentioned him to me.

She started inviting me to little business things. Again, I couldn't be sure she was interested because the events she invited me to were usually big to-do's. However, I decided to find out when she invited me to a volunteer's awards show.

That night wasn't meant to be. I was ready to go out that evening, looking hot in my shirt and silk tie, but as I climbed into my car to leave, and turned the key... nothing happened.

It was a fluke. Earlier in the day, when I was running errands I had started to switch on the headlights. I caught myself while the park lights were on and just switched them off... but something shorted across the switch and the park lights had stayed on. My six-year old battery didn't hold them up for the four hours I was at home, cleaning and getting ready for the show.

So, all I could do was call her and explain why I wasn't there... so she wouldn't wonder when I didn't show. I didn't get her, only voicemail, and when I didn't hear from her for some time after, I figured it really was nothing.

The attraction she was showing towards me was all in my mind.

Or was it? In a later email, I casually mentioned that I was planning on attending an open house where she worked. That was the night I found out my intuitions were spot on.

She told me later, that as soon as she found out I was going to be attending, she volunteered to be one of the speakers at the event. Anyway, when I arrived, she met me at the door, introduced me to her son, and stood next to where I was sitting in the room. Then she said she'd be right back.

She proceeded to go to the front of the room, and explained how working where she did was such a positive influence in her life. She explained how they had become like family for her and how they had helped her through her divorce and even helped her move towards her dreams. She has so much to be thankful for!

After she was finished, she came over to me and apologized because she had to leave and take her son home, but thanked me for coming and I told her I'd see her later.

And I did, the next day. They were offering tours the previous night after the speakers, but the guide didn't take us into the basement, which was an old fallout shelter.

Now, I love old buildings... which is partially why I'm so interested in real estate today, so I used that as a double-sided in. That day when she called, she asked what I thought, so I told her that the tour was incomplete because I didn't get to see the basement... to which she responded by inviting me over to complete the tour.

The basement was neat, but not terribly impressive... but there was an energy present with the two of us alone down there. It was everything I could do not to kiss her down there.

I later found out that she had wanted me to.

We talked for a couple of hours that day, and I invited her to lunch at the end of it... and she accepted. I still didn't know exactly where it was going... but I did find her fascinating, and while I did have girlfriend... that relationship was strained at the time, so I figured that she probably just wanted to be friends and to get me involved and want to volunteer where she worked.

And, as I am painfully aware of these days, I really need my friends. So, I was hoping at the very least we'd have that.