The new gig is going well. There is so much to learn, but everything about it is enjoyable. I’ve always enjoyed challenges, and I’ve only recently discovered I enjoy people—social nuances and finding what makes a person smile.

Will this become my career? I don’t know yet.

I have a dream I’ve been entertaining since the spring. I think it’d be cool to open a gourmet PB&J restaurant. We’d have a full line of breads, nut butters (crunchy & creamy), and jellies/spreads to choose from. Oh, and sriracha.

You haven’t tried crunchy peanut butter with sriracha? Shame on you.

I’m also fascinated with social media. Cracking the formula of social media influence to make a restaurant or bar not only successful, but hyper-successful.

It’s a fact in this area restaurants close every week. Some new and green that may have never had a chance. Some long-standing and successful that just give up. What if I can help them grow their business? What if I can help them see clientele and money they never imagined?

A major part of my reading project has been to devour books on self-esteem and writing, and also on marketing, social media, reinvention, restaurants and management.

There are people from my past I’m reaching out to—talented managers who understand the value of their teams and who are natural leaders.

Leaders. Not bosses. Anyone can be a boss.

Anyone can be a tool too. But I digress.

So I’m learning how restaurants work. How to bartend. How to interact with my teams. How to interact with people. How to make people smile.

That many of these people are lovely ladies—well, that’s just gravy.

I’ve always had a knack for understanding how business works, no matter my level in the organization. Now, I also understand what managers do—right or wrong. And I’m learning how to handle them.

I want to run my own business, and lead my team to share in the spoils.

Well, how bow dat? I finally listed a want. A real one.

A toast: to success—and my magnificent cock.

What i'm listening to:

Cooler than Me
Mike Posner
31 Minutes to Takeoff

Why am I so nervous today?

I’m starting a new job today. Down a new career path. Seriously contemplating abandoning the old career path.

I’ve grown weary of spending countless hours in front of a computer. Building things for others. To their specifications. There’s so much more to life than what’s on the screen.

I want to live. I want to work with people. I want to do something that matters.

I don’t know if this is only part of the wilderness... a developmental detour, if you will. I don’t know if I’ll return to creating cool products. Part of me would like to, and I seem to have a flair for it.

Yet, I seem to have a flair for making people smile as well. Perhaps today’s beginning is a new path for me.

Charm and delight? That’s right.

Yes, perhaps.

Change is neither good nor bad. It simply is.

Trust the process. Continue through the wilderness. Live.

What i'm listening to:

... Ready for It?
Taylor Swift
reputation

No no no no no.

Not tonight. Get out of my bed.

Don’t you dare crawl into my bed.

Aww... fuck it.

I need a new mistress. Seriously.

It is done.

I have finished fifty books since January 1.

My reading speed has increased considerably. My writing has improved as well. And I’m on pace to finish another 20 books (21.8, to be exact) before the year ends. We’ll see what happens.

A few months ago, while I was in the thirties, my chiropractor suggested I should read a li’l less. It seems “reading posture” is bad and requires more frequent adjustments.

Anyway, the journey continues. I still have plenty of books on the shelf awaiting my attention...

OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG!

If you wish to be a success in the world, promise everything, deliver nothing.

Today, in my developmental detour, I am exposed to the idea of open loops.

I’m intrigued, because I hadn’t realized just how much open loops affect me from day to day. Seriously.

The lesson was on utilizing open loops to keep conversations going and your audience interested. Fascinating, so I went ahead and used the Google to learn more, before my goldfish-sized attention span could forget about them again.

Yes, again.

Open loops have quite an effect, psychologically speaking. Think about that “to-do list” you’ve been working on. How many items on the list are complete? Great!

Now, how many have managed to linger? These are open loops. These are sapping your energy and productivity, causing you to procrastinate (further), overwhelming, and depressing you. These are killing you.

For instance, here’s a sample of my list (in no way complete, merely stream-of-consciousness):

• Call _____ and follow up on that opportunity.
• Draft a proposal for a project that was requested last month.
• Outline the current project and set milestones/deadlines.
• Clean the house.
• Change the oil and coolant in the car and list it for sale.
• Research new cell phone providers, hopefully finding a service you’re okay with paying for because your phone actually has data service.

Okay, there’s more to my list, but there’s enough here to illustrate the point. Not unlike holding court in conversation, these loops hold a place in my mind. They constantly hold some of my attention.

Each and every open loop I’ve got running is utilizing my energy. One blog I read likened it to a smartphone running too many apps. No wonder I require frequent naps! No wonder I don’t feel like getting anything done!

I’ve forgotten what completing a task actually feels like!

On that note, I’ll end this post and make that phone call.

Last evening, on the beach beside a lake, a pretty young girl had a falling out with her family. She was in tears. She needed to get away, and I had the privilege of taking her home... back into the city.

The first twenty minutes of the drive were virtually silent. She asked if she could smoke in the car, I told her I’d prefer it if she didn’t. More silence. Her phone lights up. Texting. More silence. A sniffle here and there (note to self: carry a handkerchief—or at least tissues). More texting. More sniffling. More silence. Her phone was down to 19%, so I offered her my charger.

Finally, I decided to break the silence. What do I talk about? Labor Day plans? No, she’s leaving the lakeside in the middle of the night. It’s very likely her plans for the long weekend are wrecked.

On a long drive, with no tissues, it’s clearly time to change her mood.

So, I asked if she at least got a good punch in before she left. She laughed.

We talked for a little bit about the argument. About families. About how I’m not terribly close to one side of my family either. About distance. About the psychology behind what we feel. About happiness.

We talked about books. She asked what I was reading, and I told her I had thirty pages left in Doctor Sleep. She hadn’t heard of it. I asked if she was familiar with Stephen King, to which she said she was. I told her it was the story of the boy from The Shining grown up.

I mentioned the other books I’ve read this year, about marketing and writing and pop psychology and self help. I told her about Radical Honesty and the author’s take on lies we tell ourselves and others. The chicken shit, the horse shit, the elephant shit. More laughter. I told her about Awareness, which more-or-less delivers the same message, without the references to shit.

She loved it. She told me how she loves working on improving herself. She reads when she can, but she doesn’t make time to read as much as she’d like. She enjoys writing and watching Ted Talks on the YouTube.

So, we talked a lot about people and change and being ready for anything. At some point, I mentioned my dog. Her eyes lit up and she asked me about Cordelia Jane. She shared some stories of her own Winifred Bean. She loved talking to another weirdo who gives his dog a middle name—apparently we’re rare.

We talked more about books. She told me about her favorite, Tuck Everlasting. I asked if she’d seen the movie, to which she said the book is much better. I assured her I’d add it to my reading list.

It was a beautiful connection, one that inspired me. There are girls out there I can relate to. There are girls out there I have something in common with.

As we approached the freeway exit, she picked up her phone for the first time in nearly an hour. No more tears. Virtually no sniffles. She asked for an ETA, so she could text ahead and make sure she could get in.

We conversed some more. About what, I don’t recall... then she helped navigate through the neighborhoods of the city.

When we pulled into her drive, she thanked me and said she appreciated me. We exchanged information and a fist bump. And she was gone.

Will I see her again? It’s not likely. But she gave me a bit of the drive I’ve been lacking lately.

And when I need a little push, I’ll think of that girl. And remember to savor the adventure. And I’ll meet that next girl. And we’ll see what happens.

Today’s read reinforced last night’s synchronicity. After all, “what would you do if you were not afraid?”

When you move beyond the fear, you feel free.

What i'm listening to:

Strangers
Halsey
hopeless fountain kingdom