You think you've been fucking them, and then you find out they've been fucking you all along...

This is the best quote i've found online in some time. Oddly, i find it inspiring, because it would definitely fit in with my goals for '07 to reverse the line: "You think they've been fucking you, and then you find out you've been fucking them all along."

=^D

Wow, in one post i think i've dropped more f-bombs than you'll find in my entire blog!

Anyway, moving on... weather permitting, my sister and i have plans to go out to dinner tonight to celebrate her birthday tomorrow. Of course, it is snowing out, and the Wyoming boy is still planning on the trip, but the Kansas City area always get a lot more snow than here. Add to that the population of KC, and the reported pile-ups on the news.

Well, let's just say i'm re-evaluating my decision hour by hour. We can always go out next week, but i was looking forward to going out tonight.

My sister and i have never really been close. I've always considered myself to be a bit of an ass for not reaching out and trying harder. So, i'm hoping to become a better brother this year. It's never too soon to start, right? She has a job offer that she's considering that will probably take her to a coast... she doesn't know if it will be east or west... so i'd like to start working on building some sort of brother/sister relationship before she leaves.

It is snowing again! I know i've said this many times, but i love the snow! This year, we've actually had some... and i haven't had to travel to just be in it.

It's funny, but just knowing that it is snowing outside makes me happy... almost to the point of glowing!

Even if we decide not to meet up tonight, i won't be able to stay in when i know there is snow outside!

What i'm listening to:

Open Toes
Katharine McPhee
Katharine McPhee

Another weekend has come and gone. This was the first bumpy one of the year.

It started with the phone call. The ex called Friday as my work day was winding down. I guess she just called to say "hi" and see how things are going.

She had a couple of questions for me, neither of which are going to be mentioned here.

Neither of us said much beyond that. I did ask if she was happy, to which she answered, "I suppose."

Otherwise, Friday night was pretty uneventful. I had a good night on the sound board, followed by a rather short workout... since i arrived at the gym only a half-hour before closing time. I did get to talk to A, which was probably the highlight of the evening.

Afterwards, i stopped off at the club and chatted with K for a while... and had a couple of martinis. K offered some great advice and told me not to let the call get me down. If she had known me last September... she might have seen that this call didn't get me down compared to the last one.

I didn't realize that the call had affected me until i was talking to K and she mentioned it. I suppose that's one reason not to consume alcohol after talking to C.

It's hard to explain how i was feeling in the early weekend... i wasn't depressed, but i did experience a state of lowered confidence.

Saturday, however, i got it back. The performance at the theatre was incredible, everyone was on their best game... including the inexperienced sound guy!

After the performance, i decided to go home and work on resurrecting my ailing iPod instead of going out. I honestly need to stop going out so much... not to avoid talking to women, but to get some other things done! Finding the balance is not easy anymore, now that i'm a social butterfly!

Last night, i got in a good workout, another conversation with A, as well as a surprise conversation with someone from my drawing class last fall. In fact, i almost fell off of my exercise bike when i realized who she was!

And that she was complimenting me! I suppose i should get used to these compliments.

After my workout and studying, i decided to hit another club... which turned into a fun evening hanging out with (yet another) A. She was also complimenting me on my looks, my newfound confidence (i met her last May, so she met me when i was at my worst), and my playfulness.

When it was time to go, she pecked my cheek and told me to take care. A great ending to a rough weekend...

What i'm listening to:

Say It Isn't So
Hall & Oates
Rock 'n Soul, Part 1

This is the coolest news story of the year, in my humble opinion, of course.

In 1957, the city of Tulsa, Oklahoma decided to bury a time capsule commemorating the state's 50th anniversary... so, what did they put in it?

Interestingly enough, they put a 1957 Plymouth Belvedere underground!

Now, as the state prepares for its centennial, the time capsule is to be unearthed. To sweeten the pot, Tulsan's were invited to submit guesses of Tulsa's population in 2007. The guesses are stored on microfilm and buried with the car.

The winner, or his/her heirs, wins a savings account with $100 in it (before interest, i hope!), and the car... in whatever state it might be in.

Ideally, if the crypt was constructed well, the car will be very near the condition it was the day it went underground, and will be worth a LOT of money!

Worst case scenario, it is a hulk of rusted metal, decayed rubber and rotted leather... very close to dust. Ok, maybe i'm exaggerating a tad, but it could be in very bad shape or even beyond restoration.

For those who are unaware, a 1958 Plymouth Belvedere played the role of the posessed 1958 Plymouth Fury in the movie Christine. The movie is ok, but the novel is outstanding! Since reading it, i have wanted to find and restore one of these old and rare Plymouths.

At any rate, it might be worth my while to venture down the road to Tulsa to see this car when they exhume it. I'm very curious to see it!

For more information: BuriedCar.com and Tulsa World.

What i'm listening to:

Original Sin (The Natives are ...
Pandora's Box
Original Sin

For the most part, last night was a good night. After work, i began my stint for running sound at the local civic theatre, which was a little nerve-racking, but i did pretty well. I have a few things i need to iron out regarding cues, but as my mentor said... the audience won't know if i miss one.

So, again, i need to step out of myself to succeed. Is anyone else beginning to sense a theme? ;^)

I've been playing phone tag with the local dance studio that teaches ballroom dancing. I'm it now, because they left a message while i was in production.

After the show, i decided to unwind... so i went to Target, picked up my one thing, and then headed to the gym.

I'm very pleased with what i'm starting to see at the gym... both the ladies and myself! =^)

However, i wasn't quite up for conversing last night, so i didn't talk to any of the girls there. I wasn't rude... just focused. In that respect, nights like last night have been pretty rare. I hadn't revisited my anti-social tendencies yet this year.

That didn't last long, i ended up at my favorite club in town and the bartender suggested the nightly special: the Shaker martini.

Oh my God! Those things don't taste of alcohol at all... it's like drinking punch at a party, and they went down as fast as party punch too!

There was also a new waitress at the club, so i made my first approach of the evening. The club was very slow, which was both a plus and a minus. The downside was that there weren't any women there to talk to. The bonus was making S's acquaintance.

I think we talked for a couple of hours... maybe a bit longer. While i was there, though, i received a call from a friend who said he was going to another bar: which always is hopping on Thursday nights.

He now owes me five bucks... because he wasn't there and even though i arrived ten minutes before last call i had to pay the cover.

It was late enough in the evening that there weren't any groups of ladies to talk to... they all seemed to be talking to men already, which is an easier situation to handle if i know at least someone there.

Then i saw A across the room. She had that look of trying to place me, and then looked away. Since i hadn't seen her for a while, i had to do a double take myself. The second time our eyes met, she still didn't recognize me.

So, i approached her. As soon as i did that, i could see the light bulb come on! She said i look so different, plus i dress better than i used to.

It's pretty unbelievable how easy it has become for me to approach women. Granted, i haven't really tested myself yet against just anyone... but i'm getting there. Besides knowing girls in the club give me someone to instantly talk to and build up some value.

I think i'm starting to figure it all out! And this is now a bit long... so i'll have to write more later.

What i'm listening to:

Private Eyes
Hall & Oates
Private Eyes

I attended a party early Friday evening that was a fun networking event for a friend. It was a lot of fun, and gave me the opportunity to work on my socializing skills and meet new people... and eat!

The location was cool too, an old warehouse that is now a furniture store. This young lady i met there and i even tried out the old lift that still functions there!

And i discovered roasted red pepper hummus. Yummy!

Later that evening, i attended the cast/crew party for the theatre production i'm a part of. Again, good people, good food, and plenty of alcohol! After the previous party, i'm afraid i didn't partake in the latter... i was still plenty buzzed from all of the vodka!

Somehow i totally missed Saturday morning, and the start of the big snowstorm. Have i mentioned how much i love the snow? Anyway, my work belated-Christmas party was Saturday evening. No new people there, but it was a fun gathering and a surprisingly good potluck dinner! We enjoyed the Christmas episode of The Office and the dirty Santa gift exchange...

After the party, and undaunted by the piling snow outside, i met up with a friend and hit a bar for last call. This particular bar had a very sexy cocktail waitress with an interesting tattoo on her backside. One of the bartenders was a familiar face, as she used to serve me those outstanding sandwiches! The other was having a good night, having made sixty bucks selling her brassiere to a patron... understandable, since she was a very cute brunette!

I wouldn't pay a girl to get her bra, but i suppose there are some people who would. I personally enjoy the challenge of getting the bra through charm and charisma! =^)

Since she was staying with my friend's sister, we gave her a ride after the bar closed, during which she wanted to spend some of her new wealth... which led to watching a DVD late into the night.

Quite possibly, it was the stupidest movie i've ever seen. And scary, only because it could really happen.

Anyway, Sunday morning i'm cleaning out the car, and i discovered a red brassiere in my back seat. Apparently, at some point of the evening she got her bra back... only to forget it in my car.

Since i didn't obtain it in an acceptable way, i'll have to return it next time i see her...

What i'm listening to:

Sleep With Me Instead
Louise Goffin
Sometimes a Circle

Sometimes people really amaze me.

Today, i had to get gas. My tank was almost bone dry, and i just couldn't put it off any longer.

Well, my running out of gas just happened to coincide with a twenty cent price drop. I used to complain about gas prices, but i really don't worry about money anymore... there are more important things to worry about.

But it was nice to see nonetheless.

However, i don't know about this society we live in these days. You drop the price well below two bucks a gallon, and it's like people have never seen a gas station before!

Hell, the lines were down the street and around the corner.

I wasn't in a hurry, since i decided to pass up my heliotherapy before rehearsal today... so i'm sitting in my car, jamming to Madonna and munching on my egg salad sub.

Then i observed something... it made sense, but later i found it was only coincidence.

All of the cars lined up have the fill on the passenger side. Naturally, i assumed they were lined up for the same pump since they were parked single file pointing toward the appropriate pump.

And then a car with the fill on the driver's side has no cars behind it... so i pull in behind it. I heard a horn honk, but i didn't think anything of it since the traffic on the street was blocked from the lines.

As soon as that car leaves, i pull up. I'm barely out of my car when a VW Beetle backs up, whips around and pulls up behind me. I guess this lady is in a bigger hurry than i am... i just considered myself lucky.

When she gets out of the car, i tell her that the hose will reach, that i'm not in a hurry, and she can go first... but in a huff, she just tells me that i "cut in the line" and i might as well go ahead.

She was very snooty about it too. =^\

So, it was hard to feel too bad... because in the time it took to put the 14 gallons in my Celica (see, i told you i was about out), every other car... including ones that were behind her, managed to pull up to a pump.

I guess i just can't believe that people get so ramped up about gas prices that a sudden drop makes them panic. Personally, with the downward trend, i was wishing i had enough gas to go two more days... watch and see if the trend continued.

Oh well, i got my gasoline, and i suppose she got hers. It's all good.

I just can't believe that $1.76 gas makes all people forget their manners... it's more than a bit disappointing, really!

What i'm listening to:

Goodbye Yellow Brick Road
Elton John
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road

Sometimes i cannot believe i can actually go so long with nothing to write about. It's not that nothing is going on... i suppose there is some truth to the adage that i'm "too happy to blog."

Which would seem to indicate that "emo blog" is redundant... kind of like a donkey's ass.

But i digress.

I suppose i could write about my mysterious voice mail message from a couple of days ago, but really, what can i say that i haven't already?

I'd be lying if i said i don't want to talk to her. However, it has been a long time. I'm not the same person i was a month ago, let alone three, six or even nine months. I've made a lot of good changes in my life, and in my attitude, and it shows! I'm in the best shape and health of my life!

She indicated she wanted to talk. For that, i'm game. Anything else, we'll have to wait and see. It isn't worth my time to speculate on what she wants to talk about. She said she'd call back, so i'll just have to let her.

I've been keeping rather busy, but i've already made some progress on my "list." Every night since i've returned from vacation, i've had rehearsal at the local community theatre, which has not only cut into my blogging time, but my workout and social schedules.

I'm having a blast though... and i've met some incredible people and i've found a place i just naturally seem to blend in. I'm not sure why i waited so long!

On that note, i'm going to close this. There's more to say, but it can wait for another day. =^)

What i'm listening to:

Hold on to Me
Nina Gordon
Tonight and the Rest of...

So, i arrive at my car after class. Out of habit, i reach into the dash to pick up my phone and flip it open... and i see i missed a call.

Who the call was from, however, i was not expecting.

So, now i have to admit, i'm curious about why she might have called. It has been a long time since we spoke. I'm curious whether she'll call back.

After so long...

So far, i'm enjoying my holiday!

I've had plenty of time to figure a few more things out during my long stretches driving in my car... which is allowed because i can't really act (other than driving) while i'm on the road. Besides, my goal isn't to not think about what i should/shouldn't do... but to not let my analysis process cripple the action process.

I'd have liked to see more snow on my trip, but alas i'm currently in drought country. Weather permitting, i intend to take the "through Colorado" route on my return trip. Then i'll be able to play in the snow on my rest stops! =^)

One thing i've figured out is that my new quest for a new partner now has different rules. Really, i should have had these rules all along, because i know from experience that they work... but somewhere in my transition period over the last few months, i had forgotten.

It isn't about the players, it's about the experience. If i focus on the experience, the players will happen on their own... focusing on the players only allows me to lose sight of the mission, as well as discounting any perfectly eligible players from entering the game.

Remembering how to play the game moves me towards one of my goals.

Anyway, so far my vacation hasn't allowed for many "social" moments. Even though i'm eager to get out and interact socially, i'm incredibly anxious about doing this in my hometown. You could say that my reputation proceeds me.

And let's just say that my reputation isn't exactly of my creation. I suppose the words of popular enemies can really taint a person.

Don't get me wrong, i will get out at least once while i'm here... and i will approach women. I just haven't yet.

Besides, it has given me some fantastic quality family time... something i've neglected on my last several trips home.

Tomorrow (today?) i'm looking forward to visiting a nearby city and doing some shopping/eating/socializing. Then tomorrow evening i'll go out and play with a friend i've not seen in seven years... and who has always inspired me to be a more social animal.

My itinerary is filling up... which is fine! Apparently i'm plenty relaxed if i cannot seem to fall asleep this evening, right? =^)

What i'm listening to:

Don't Forget to Remember Me
Carrie Underwood
Some Hearts