Prepare to be shocked. I know I was.

I am not a narcissist. Many days I wish I was. Life might be so much easier.

Believe me, I’ve tried. There may have even been moments I believed I was narcissistic. The center of the simulation.

Plus, I’ve enjoyed making fun of narcissists. Like fat kids, it’s okay, because I am one. I even have the t-shirt.

As time marches on, though, too many things in my life just don’t add up.

Being around narcissists drains me. I am still working on my own evolution. I want to be more social. I want to surround myself with good people. Healthy people.

The beautiful ones.

And I’m making great strides in this arena. In fact, this is how I’ve discovered that being social and around people is NOT what’s draining me. Only certain people. Perhaps it is appropriate to refer to them as the vampires. Only because I have referred to them before...

Also, I know plenty of narcissists. Some are extremely manipulative. These are the people that replace your hopes and dreams with their own.

Being around these “friends” is one reason why I struggle to figure out what I want. Why I struggle to take care of myself.

It is hard to work on yourself and determine what you want when you’re busy working on what others expect from you. It is time to stop concentrating on others’ obligations and demands.

Remember: YOU are the only one who has your best interests at heart.

Everyone has an agenda, including me. This is how we get through life. How we learn. How we adapt. How we evolve.

Letting other people determine and control your life is a way to get stuck. Again, they rarely (if ever) consider anyone else’s needs, wants, plans above their own.

Granted, some of these people we cannot easily escape. Bosses, family, friends. Or can we?

No, this is not me. I am not a narcissist.

What i'm listening to:

The Show Must Go On
Queen
Innuendo