Tomorrow is definitely a day worth celebrating! The silly season will have officially ended for another year!

Yay!

So, today i'm a little on the down side. Hopefully it isn't anything serious. It is the first year in some time i haven't had to worry about planning anything special, or coming up with that perfect gift, or what have you.

I'm a little sad because that is something i have a talent for. This is the one day of the year i consistently hit it out of the park... but there is no game scheduled for today.

Which explains that feeling that something is missing.

I wonder if tonight would be a good night to go out? Will i be bombarded by Hershey's and Hallmark and cutesy couples walking hand in hand? Or will i find other singles who decided to go out and celebrate their single-ness?

Yes, i should go out... at least for a bit. See what's going on around town. After all, it is dollar margarita night! =^)

At the very least, i can celebrate the return to normalcy!

What i'm listening to:

Possession
Sarah McLachlan
Fumbling Towards Ecstasy

Ah, yes! It truly is the most wonderful time of the year!

It snowed again last night. Big, fluffy snowflakes that accumulated quickly. The snow makes the city so beautiful, covering up all of the dirt and grime. It really is too bad it doesn't have some sort of cleansing effect.

Oh well, i'll enjoy the snow while it lasts! =^D

It seems like few things truly make me giddy these days, but the snowfall always manages to make me feel great!

Of course, then i realize i have to go to work...

While i've learned it is important to live in the moment and not concern myself with the past or the future... it helps to know there will be more wonderful snowy days like this.

What i'm listening to:

Love Comes Quickly
Pet Shop Boys
Please

I'm considering going into seclusion for a month or so.

Ok, not total seclusion... clearly that would be a bad idea. However, i need to work on building my confidence, shrugging off problems that are really insignificant in the grand scheme, and work on becoming comfortable around women.

Unsurprisingly, i didn't get any matches in the speed dating... but i don't think i should be hard on myself. After all, that was a night where people probably went there with something specific in mind... maybe even a bit of husband hunting.

And me? Well, let's just say i'm into having fun right now and rediscovering myself as well as different women. I'm not terribly interested in dating as much as i am getting to know women and figuring out what's working and what isn't.

Getting over the shyness, but i don't think i'm having a problem there... just a few awkward pauses. I need to become more engaging too.

Having said that, i seem to be developing great rapport with the branch manager of my new bank... so some things are going great!

However, i still don't think a state of quasi-seclusion will be bad. It should enable me to get caught up on my homework, side projects, and sleep! Normally i have my taxes in the mail on February 1, so i'm already over a week behind!

What i'm listening to:

U + Ur Hand
Pink
I'm Not Dead

Since the big transition, i've been a member of the eHarmony community. At the time it seemed like a great idea: you take their personality profile, which reveals your strengths and weaknesses; you pick out a few of the more superficial things that you require; and their system goes into their community of members and builds "matches" based on compatibility.

Sounds simple enough, but just like the actual dating world... nothing is that simple.

For instance, last week i'm matched up with possibly the first young lady i've gotten excited about since signing up. She apparently liked what she read in the "about me" section, because she initiated contact first.

We actually made it all of the way to step 3, but she read something she didn't like in my "must haves/can't stands," because she closed the match before i could even see hers.

What bothered me about her closing the match was that i didn't even get to see hers, and compare them and ask questions about them... which the manual states we should do. What if there was only one thing? I guess i'll never know.

Combine that with the fact that i'm still in a very fluid and transitional state. What i put in my profile today, i might possibly strike tomorrow. I guess i'm just not that quick to discount someone who might just be eligible.

I think it's important to keep an open mind... what's wrong with that?

In that vein, last night i attended a speed dating event. I figured it would be a fun experience if nothing else... but didn't go in with any expectations.

All in all, it was a fun evening... and i did meet a couple of ladies i wouldn't mind getting to know better.

Last night, i meant to bring my 'A' game, but i'm still having difficulty relaxing and finding my focus after a crazy day. Some nights i do alright, but last night wasn't one of them.

However, my 'B' game may have been good enough. I was charming, playful, and dressed to kill. I guess we'll see when the event coordinators compile the results!

Now, i suppose it's worth stating that i'm not sure i believe online dating or speed dating can and will work for me. I have grown a lot over the last several months, and i am a lot more confident and comfortable when talking to new women. So, am i wasting my time with these activities? No, because i'm still gaining experiences and being social... and who knows? I could find that special young lady anywhere... even in the ether!

I'm no longer ready to settle down... i want to play the field for a bit longer before i find her. I think of all of those opportunities i passed up (and the one that i didn't) while i was involved, and i'm working towards atoning for those regrets. If i had only known how things would go down... i'd have played it a lot different.

Which leads me to my blog find of the day:

You don't even know the meaning of the words “I'm sorry.” You said you would love me until you die, and as far as I know you're still alive.

For what it's worth, i like the quote... and i can relate to it... but i really am happier than i've been in years and i have so much to do and look forward to that she would only get in my way.

I will find my princess(es). =^)

What i'm listening to:

Africa
Toto
Toto IV

At least one facet of my new life is progressing nicely. My workouts appear to be doing some good!

Stats for today: current weight is 162 lbs., distance i can run around the track without walking is 1.2 miles, distance out of 2.5 miles i ran is 1.7 miles.

Number of girls who made eye contact and smiled? Five.

That may not seem like a lot, but to a former fat kid like me... it's pretty cool!

Saturday evening, i went out with a friend after the play and ended up at a club. Someone was there who i'd met last May, but she had only seen me recently in shorts and a t-shirt... Saturday, i was dressed very nicely in a pinstriped shirt, dark jeans, and black shoes.

She looked at me, looked away, and then looked again with her hand over her eyes like she was trying to get a better look.

Eventually, we spent a bit of time together that evening, and she couldn't get over how great i'm looking these days... and was going to tell all of her friends/coworkers who know of me as well.

Gave me a nice warm fuzzy, that's for sure!

So, why haven't i asked her out? I have my reasons. Let's just say, i'm not dating right now... i'm still becoming acquainted with this new confident and playful self.

Soon, though... soon.

What i'm listening to:

Feelin' Love
Paula Cole
This Fire

Yesterday, i ate lunch at a former gas station turned into a Chinese/Japanese/Korean restaurant. The spicy Korean pork there is really quite good.

I was intrigued to read my fortune that was in my cookie. It said, "You are busy, but you are happy."

How true! I don't know that i've never been this overbooked in my life! I never imagined i'd hit a point where i have to tell someone "no."

I am having fun... lots of it! I still need to refine my time management, because i'm beginning to fall behind in my studies... which could prove detrimental to "the plan."

While it's not a priority, i've been making it one because it has proven to be a major inconvenience. A couple of weeks ago, my computer experienced an iTunes crash... while my iPod was plugged in. What i didn't realize until the next morning was that it took 80% of my music off of my iPod when it did it. So, i've been working on rebuilding playlists and trying to salvage play count and rating data. I've spent three years training my iPod to play music i like... i'm not going to start over if i can help it!

So, that has kept life interesting.

I also have class, homework, and my volunteer job filling up most evenings. I almost feel obligated to give up tomorrow night's plans to work on a favor for a friend... but i haven't decided yet. I've really been looking forward to my one free-ish night... and i think "speed-dating" night at the club will be a blast!

And anything could happen! ;^)

Saturday and Sunday will be the next days i have breathing room, but i'll need to work on homework those days.

However, life is good. I'm really enjoying my classes, my volunteer work, my workouts, and the people i'm meeting in all of my activities. Hopefully, some of these friendships will be lasting.

And, i'm very thankful that the fortune cookie didn't read, "Duck!" =^D

What i'm listening to:

Boys Wanna Fight
Garbage
Bleed Like Me

Found on another blog:

To do: Start baking. Read more. Listen to more music. Make more music. Take baths. Ride my bike. Take pictures. Find a job. Be alone. Be together. Stop apologizing. Stop being afraid of my future.

It's a very good plan, and it goes well with my yearly goals.

Today, with one month down and only eleven to go, i thought it might be interesting to look at my progress.

I'm not going to make excuses for not making profound progress... because i think that is unrealistic to expect anyway. However, i know that i would like to be farther along than i am. I am taking steps in the right direction... and as long as i'm taking action, i really cannot be disappointed in my successes and failures!

I did have a great time with my sister and her friends the other night. We went out to eat, and then back to her house to talk, watch television, and mostly just relax!

And have i ever mentioned that her friend/roommate is really, really cute?

She said that her job relocation probably won't happen until April, and when she moves she wants to sell her furniture and buy new when she gets there.

I may just have to take it off of her hands... it is really nice furniture! =^) And, that will remove something from my list! Win-win! I even like the color.

Whenever we do spend time together, it always amazes me just how much we do have in common. It's odd because we were raised in two very different households: me with my mother, her with our dad. It is very cool though to reconnect with her.

My sound board gig at the civic theatre is going very well. It almost feels like i'm a natural... but then i've always had a knack for technology. That combined with my unusually exceptional hearing, it's like i found a great way to give back! And i really do love spending time with my new theatre friends/family... especially now that i'm starting to relax there and they're warming up to me.

I'm on the waiting list for the next ballroom dancing class. As soon as they have enough participants, i'll get the call. Yay!

Last night, i ventured out to the club... even though i wasn't feeling well, which resulted in a failed workout. Going out ended up being just what i needed.

It was a bit slow when i showed up... only one woman there, and she was with someone. The beer pong was going on... which i just detest in such a classy joint. "Yum yum" had already been sent home because business was slow, so i didn't get to see her either.

After a couple of drinks, i'd decided to leave when a couple of dental hygienists from out of town came in with one guy. One of the young ladies was displaying a LOT of PDA with the guy, and the other kept looking my way.

I actually managed to scrape together my confidence and ordered a rare third drink so i could go talk to her.

By the time the night was over, i ended up establishing rapport with not only "J," but with the bar's owner and manager as well. In fact, the manager wants me to decide the Thursday martini specials... and to start coming in on Wednesday night.

And bumping and grinding on the dance floor with J certainly didn't suck either!

What i'm listening to:

Coming for You
JoJo
The High Road