I'm off to a fabulous start today. I haven't overslept in a looong time, and this morning i didn't just oversleep... i slept through my alarm clock.

That means sleeping through about two hours of bells ringing and "RAHNT-RAHNT-RAHNT-RAHNT."

What could i have been dreaming to sleep through that?

So, today i'm groggy, i was late for work (and therefore get to miss lunch)... and they are working on the roof over my head which has the effect of listening to a storm coming in off the ocean.

And somehow, this will probably be the highlight of my day. Although, i suppose anything could happen in history class tonight. I'm not exactly sure how to interpret when someone keeps watching you from across the room... although i know what it means when i watch someone from afar. However, clearly i don't know how women think.

She is very beautiful... and if she's noticing me, then maybe it is time to notice back?

Ok, so what happened last week was a non-event.

However, taking the time i did to think about everything to get it all out and move on was significant... at least in my mind.

I suppose taking the time to reflect is good. In fact, it helped me to realize a few things and what the next steps have to be.

First of all, i realized that she has no power over me. Thinking about what could have been doesn't do any good... but in the same vein, some of the things i've figured out over the last week have cleared my mind and i've regained some focus.

Focus is what i've been seriously lacking since the 'before time.' Well, that and sex.

I even figured out an explanation of the "minus six days," which really brings out into the light one of her biggest character flaws. She cannot deal with conflict. At all. She may have been in love with me, but one stupid argument was enough to make her crawl into someone else's bed. Then, when they have an argument... who does she call? Who does she want to make up with? Yet, she won't do anything to complicate the situation she's in...

Basically, she's weak. I deserve someone who will stick to what she believes. Someone who'll stand up for herself. Someone who will fight for a love she believes in.

And i will find that, someday.

If she has a Southern drawl... so much the better! =^)

Anyway, the last week or so revealed one of my big character flaws as well. I'm a great thinker. I'll mull stuff over and over and over and... (well, you get the picture)... and next thing i know i've wasted weeks without actually doing anything.

In a recent post i mentioned several "i want to's." Well, what's stopping me? Nothing but my own inaction... i can talk about something forever and ever, but it doesn't do my any good until i actually do something about it.

All of these dreams that don't involve finding a companion are achievable... which means i need to stop trying to find someone, get on with my life and let her find me.

Simple enough, right? We'll see.

What i'm listening to:

Love You to Death
Type O Negative
October Rust