Thursday, September 9, 2021, 3:25 am

Not the elf you're looking for

I don’t know why I bristle at the word, “Buddy.”

I guess it’s a throwback from the past. Too many girls who used it to friendzone someone. Like, “friend.”

And “Awww, thanks.”

Yet it shouldn’t bother me if I’m not attracted to her, right? Unless, deep, deep down, I really want to sleep with her.

That’s not entirely outside of the realm of possibility. After all, it is easy to find SOMETHING attractive about every girl. And it may not be possible for men and women to be friends.

Anyway, I wish you’d stop calling me, “Buddy.” Let’s just get that out of the way right now.