It has been a rough couple of days. I’m not going to lie—I want my dog back.

So, I’m trying to cope. To grieve. To mourn.

This house feels so empty.

Some moments, I’m on the verge of falling apart.

Yet, she knew it was near. She was no longer able to hide the fear she felt as her body was failing her. Her last kiss proved to me it was the right thing to do.

Of course, the memory of the last kiss is what chokes me up each and every time.

So, I’m trying to cope. To grieve. To mourn.

Maybe it’ll get easier. Maybe it won’t.

I hope I always think of her fondly. She was a good dog. And she loved me more than any other living being. And proved that every single day.

She knew.

I discovered this passage on the internet over the summer, when her health started to fail. It helps, because it so accurately describes a dog’s love of life.

People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life—like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right? Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.

Then last month, I heard the following... which helps. I know it’s going to be alright. I know it’s natural. Yet, I can’t help feeling this void where my girl should still be...

Every life comes to an end, when time demands it. Loss of life is to be mourned, but only if the life was wasted.

Her life was no waste. We brought each other so much love—so much joy.

Yet, she was my old lady. She knew.

So, I’m trying to cope. To grieve. To mourn.

She doesn’t want me to be sad for her. It’s okay to be sad she’s gone, but it’s much more important to be thankful she was here... she was such an important part of my life.

It is critical to celebrate our lives together. To move on. To achieve those goals. To close the open loops. To get unstuck. To stop stagnating.

#forCordelia

I love you, baby girl.