Thursday, August 21, 2008, 2:05 pm

Can't find the irony in missing the early bird...

Perhaps the only perk of my job is finding out when certain cool things happen around town. For instance, Tuesday I learned that “Birdie, the Early Bird” was going to appear today at a local McDonald’s from 7:30 am to 10 am.

Of course, I was thinking that would make for the perfect picture for Facebook and MySpace... so I set my alarm early, set the camera out and went to bed at a normal hour last night.

And naturally, the elements have conspired against me. I’ve had insomnia since I’ve been back from Europe... and I’m averaging 2-4 hours of sleep a night... which usually doesn’t begin until around 3 am. Last night was no exception. It is SO fun tossing and turning, being too hot, then too cold, reading, listening to podcasts and audiobooks, and NOT falling asleep.

So, when seven rolled around, I wasn’t really interested in getting up. Besides, I had until 10, right? I hit the snooze and dozed a bit longer.

Finally, I’m up at 8:30, still groggy and using Excedrin to jump start my day. I run through the shower and decide to shave. My bathroom faucet is leaky, and I’ve not had time to fix it (although you’d think I’d have plenty with the insomnia and stuff), so I turn the water on and off below the vanity before and after I use the sink. Fine, throw everything together, check email, and I’m out the door at 9:35. Since it only takes five minutes to get to that McDonald’s from my house, I should be ok! I still think it’s a cool idea for a Facebook photo!

I didn’t count on the train sitting parked on the tracks between hither and yawn. I don’t even wait, I U-turn and head through downtown.

Now, at this point, I should mention that in the city of Topeka, a traffic signal isn’t doing it’s job unless it has collected at least a dozen cars to no cross traffic. Today was no exception.

At 9:50, I’m a block away and I see that the road is closed to through traffic... fine, I dart through the adjacent parking lot. Yep, the road work runs past it too, so I have to turn around and skirt around a couple more blocks to get there.

I walk into McDonald’s at 9:55... no sign of Birdie anywhere. Naturally. While it was a cool idea, it’s not worth getting my knickers in a twist, and I get to order breakfast (which was part of the original plan anyway).

Now, if I were naturally a morning person, or I were sleeping normally, I might find some irony in missing the “early bird,” but I don’t think anyone who knows me would/could have expected otherwise. Morning, I’m not at my best, and I’m chronically late before 10 am anyway. C’est la vie.

What i'm listening to:
One of the Boys I Kissed a Girl
Katy Perry
One of the Boys