Fear is a funny thing.

No, not "ha, ha" funny... it's just hard to wrap your head around it.

First, let's look at the standard definition:

fear n. 1. a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid. 2. a specific instance of or propensity for such a feeling: an abnormal fear of heights. 3. concern or anxiety; solicitude: a fear for someone's safety. 4. reverential awe, esp. toward God. 5. that which causes a feeling of being afraid; that of which a person is afraid: Cancer is a common fear.
v. (used with object) 6. to regard with fear; be afraid of. 7.to have reverential awe of. 8. Archaic. to experience fear in (oneself).
v. (used without object) 9. to have fear; be afraid. Courtesy of Dictionary.com

I think what's fascinating, yet hard to grasp at the same time, is that there are so many levels of fear.

Or are there?

My dog, Aspen, has a paralyzing fear of thunderstorms. Observing her during a storm, it is clear that her fear is so intense that her mind just shuts down. She seeks absolutely nothing but comfort and shelter from the storm. There is nothing I can do to change this, no way to train it out of her. Her "freak outs" are a behavior that cannot be modified.

Myself, I have a fear of heights. I don't like being up high, on a ladder, peeking over a cliff, ferris wheel, whatever... I'd just rather not do that. However, as a human being, can I modify my anxieties? Can I put them to a more productive use than the typical paralyzing fear?

Something else that makes me "freeze" and is terribly irrational is video cameras. I've learned to accept still cameras, and I don't mind having pictures taken, but I abhor being on someone's video.

Last night, I was at this event shooting pictures... and when the news cameras showed up, I promptly left.

Is that so irrational?

Ok, so now I'm trying to wrap my head around my fear of heights and news cameras... and make some sort of link with my fear of failure (success). Are they similar? Are they different? Is it merely a choice of deciding I'm going to work on each one, one at a time? Is it better to tackle all at once?

Whatever, I'll figure it out someday... as long as my analysis doesn't lead to paralysis.

What i'm listening to:

Burnin' for You
Blue Öyster Cult
Fire of Unknown Origin