Tuesday, March 19, 2019, 8:37 am

Chains of politeness

Growing up, I was raised to be polite. Social grace. Manners. All of that bullshit.

Yes, bullshit. Now I’m finding out just how much bullshit.

One of the more persistent voices in my head, still gets an odd li’l rush when I’m being polite. I guess I’ve been indoctrinated well, because it’s causing me to miss opportunities. It always has.

Yesterday, while I was cleaning out the garage, I stumbled upon a note I’d written to my girl at the time. The exact wording isn’t important... nor effective. Why? Because it is the. exact. same. thing. I still message my girls. A message I send thinking it’s cute. Thinking it’s original. Thinking it’s effective.

It’s not.

It is polite though.

So, a friend of mine has met someone new. Someone with whom there was an instant spark. Someone who, only two days ago, he would have totally dismissed as out of his league and out of disinterest.

Someone with instant attraction.

He won’t blow it. Because he knows when NOT to be polite.

You see, my problem is this irrational fear of blowing it by pushing boundaries. I can quote Ferris Bueller and say, “You can never go too far.” But I don’t believe it. No, not really.

So, I’m still missing opportunities... or flat out not seeing them.

With our friends, conversations naturally gravitate toward innuendo. We drop our shields. To that end, I know to be more effective with girls that I need to talk to her like I would talk to my best friend.

Occasionally, it’s easy. I don’t know why it was so easy with Denise. Yet it was.

Then I struggle to remember what our conversations were about. Fail.

If you aren’t her fantasy, why not?

This. This is what adds that mystery—a certain je ne sais quoi.

She doesn’t want me to ask her how her day was. She doesn’t want me to ask how she slept. Or if she ate. She wants me to get her wet.

Yet, subconsciously, that instinct is suppressed. Something is preventing me from taking things to a sexual level. Something within the shadow that needs to be set free...

Fuck politeness. It’s time to be aware of what’s happening. To take advantage of these opportunities. To take it to the next level.

What i'm listening to:
Brother to Brother I Just Wanna Stop
Gino Vannelli
Brother to Brother
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