So, we have a problem…

Today, I realized something. I can’t unsee it. But here we are.

I don’t know if we can make this work. I don’t know if we can overcome it. I don’t know how we fix it.

And as a man, that is devastating.

Since you told me about the affair…

Now, every time you don’t answer a call. Every time there’s a delay in responding. I automatically assume you’re with him.

I know you won’t lie to me. Omission is how you deceive.

Will that remain my default? Whenever you are… you… and busy, silent, otherwise… will I just assume you’re with him?

And now, here we are. The turning point in the road. At this point, I don’t know if you can totally have me… if you even want me.

It’s been over a month. I am no longer choosing you.

You took me for granted. Took it for granted that I might be permanent.

And now, I have hooked a replacement. A newer model. She knows about you, and her and I are being honest about where we stand and what we want.

Yours and my connection is still there. But it’s tarnished. Corroded. Weakened.

Will it survive? Lord, I still want you. I don’t want to only want you for your pussy… but I know I always will, so…

But… I just don’t trust you. I don’t know if I will again. Not trusting you feels odd, considering you now trust me completely.

Maybe I will again. Maybe this is a lesson in how trust works. How it’s built. Earned. Rebuilt.

On this journey, I’ve learned to love women for who they are. And this. This is part of that. For better or worse.

Understanding human nature and evolutionary psychology—possibly too well—I can’t even get mad. Everyone looks. Everyone flirts. Everyone cheats.

Integrity is forged. It is not a natural state. And sometimes it is forged from looking. Flirting. Cheating.

Sigh. Here we are. Since the affair, I don’t have anything left to lose where you’re concerned. Maybe we aren’t meant to be. If he wants you, he can have you. All I need is for you to let me know—then let me go.